This post came about from something that we are currently discussing in our free and private DISCORD BRAVOHOOD channel. (if that link was used up, top of the page should have a active one)
I shared a post from Reddit’s AmITheAsshole and asked why it a horrible first date. Here is the original post-
K I’m a 20 year old college guy and I met this cute asian girl at a party over the weekend. So we were texting and we agreed to go out for lunch, well I took her to a Chinese buffet, I’ve been there before and think it’s good. Well she was really annoyed about it, she thought it was a “shitty” and “racist” move for me to take her there. I was just like wtf. She was unhappy like the whole time and then she was saying she thought I was just using it to get in her pants, which wasn’t the case. Wtf. Was I wrong here?
So besides the part about race, why was this a horrible date?
What is the TRUE purpose of a first date?
So what a date ISN’T= it’s not the time to STUFF YOUR FAT FACE!!!
It’s your time to SHINE.
You DHV by taking her to a cool spot and/or doing something cool. That gives her a glimpse into what you are about, what kind of man you are, and to see if you like the same type of things.
Some of my favorite examples=
- A cool nerd dive bar with arcade games and awesome drinks
- A cool pizza place where you see them being made, tossed into the air and then a wood fire oven, see them come out 3 minutes later and she enjoys the BEST pizza she’s ever had with you
- Korean BBQ or Shabu Shabu, where cooking the food together is part of the date
- Take her to something new and teach her a bit about it= how to eat sushi the PROPER way, how to use chopsticks, how to pick a good song and perform at karaoke night
- A whiskey or wine tasting event
- A hidden speakeasy she never would have known about without you
- A awesome/horrible open mic comedy show. Both have pros and cons
It’s also your chance to find out about her. For you to SCREEN HER and see if she is cool enough for YOU, and then build a connection.
…or, you know, you can go somewhere and sit down and talk for 20 mins, then eat a burger in silence, then have the spotlight back on you to talk and carry the conversation.
I’d rather have the date do some of the work for me and let the ENTIRE night be a cool experience that shows her how I am different from all the other guys she’s hung out with before.
Here is a clip from last weeks Online Game 4.0 weekly coaching call where I went more in depth on DHV dates and demo’ed how I would use this back when I lived in LA at one of my favorite mexican food spots.